Go further to get closer

When one speaks of the evolution of humans, strange questions pop up in my mind. They say that we have evolved from chimpanzees and over billions of years, our brains have been constantly improving. From acting on impulses, we have evolved to become the most rational entities on this earth. For every decision that needs to be taken, millions of reasoning steps come into the picture to decide on an action which most of the time is inconsequential.

We proclaim ourselves to be the rational beings who are not misled by facts or preachings that are too unfortunate to be irrational. But once relationships come into the play, human evolution and rationality become silent and impulses dominate the scene. Was love so unfortunate not to have succumbed to ideologies of rationality or was it God’s wish that certain things be out of reach of logic and rationality for the good of humans? Whatever be the questions and answers, every mortal on this earth would unanimously accept that there is no limit to how far one can go to get closer to the ones we love.

Relations and love
As already said, relations and love are even more peculiar than the peculiar humans. One lives a life in a monotonous manner and silently they enter. Sometimes, the change takes a few hours and sometimes it takes a few months but it all happens silently, escaping the consciousness of the mortal man. Later when we reflect on our lives, we realise that many changes have taken place. People and love have entered and left. While the entry has escaped the reach of the conscious mind, the exit hasn’t.

New relations, new friendship and love- they all bring with them happiness - happiness that merges with the existing life as silently as it can, without proudly announcing its arrival but still the effect on an individual isn’t too trivial. It is present but hidden. Relations are things that are concerned to an individual and not to the society as a while. The individual celebrates the event unknowingly and relishes it for the lifetime of the relation. But once the relationship makes an exit, things are no longer silent. The heart wails and pleads that things take a U turn but they don’t. Long periods of silence and remorse follow and the human accepts defeat.

The entry was silent while the exit wasn’t. But when one reflects on one’s life, it is the silent entry and the presence of the relation that is recollected more prominently than the exit. The happiness of those moments manage to bury the sorrow of the departing times. Love is a state of the mind. The physical presence of the person is not the only way to enjoy it. Memories are indestructible and one can live with those memories.

How far?
Now we move back to the question of how far one can go for the one he loves, the answer depends on many things - the intensity of the love and the past being the major ones. ‘Love is blind’ is a saying often quoted which is absolutely true. When in love or a relationship, nothing seems impossible. Even though the presence of love may not always be realised by the conscious mind, the subconscious mind does, which is the one to take decisions on impulses rather than logic. And so, talking out for a stroll at midnight or carrying the other person on one’s arms up the peak of Mt Everest are both possible and are infact the same.

In unconditional love, the individuals involved are totally committed to one another. They live together as a single person even though they are two distinct individuals, often varying in numerous aspects. They see with the same eyes, listen with the same ears and love with the same heart. When the two have unified into a single individual, the question of fulfilling the wishes and desires of the other person doesn’t arise. The desires and wishes belong to both of them and not to one of them that are to be satisfied buy the other. However, all this is true only of true love. When love arises out of needs and personal interests, moving one step behind to stay in synchronisation with the other may also be an ordeal.

The other factor that assumes importance is the nature of the past that has seen interaction between the two. One realises the importance of the other only when they are separated. Humans have a tendency to take things for granted. They assume that the things that are endowed on them are their rights. They don’t realise that nothing in this world has an obligation to please the interests of an individual. A relation that has been broken and mended sometimes in the past is in a few cases stronger than the one without any loss.

The period during which the involved have been deprived of the love and affection of the other person teaches them valuable lessons - the importance of the other person and of how void life can become in their absence. It is this realisation that makes one as a slave to the other person - a slave who lives for the other and carries out the orders but still is respected and loved as a king. It is this realisation that ensures longevity of the relation and it is this realisation that makes nothing in this world impossible as long as the other person has his involvement in the task.

Humans are intelligent and humans are rational. But it is true only as long as we are outside the scope of love and relationships. Once love enters the scene, rationality and logic recedes to the background and one can go to any extent for the one he loves. Pure love emerges as triumphant winner at the end.

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